Illustration by Abigail Dring
in the night
she was melting so
she undressed (me) like a dream
try to touch her, hands-free
& left me
daffodils, everywhere
The years fell away or plummeted
pummeling one on top
of the one before that ended too soon
we ended too soon
America, my love, Oh country
Oh, circus of
Fools each one drops like a dance we’ve never rehearsed but you know by heart this is how i know you were meant for me
of course, they laugh
of course, they panic after
of course, they lunge
when they smell my stench
they hunger for mass
Hysteria,
i am not sure if i am breathing or already gone, lover or evacuation
They call me a deadly crisis
They warn each other not to breathe me in
i am far from home
& you have no manners
Oh! fireworks and the eyes which hold the whole bleeding sky
They do not see me coming in the dark
They, full of barbecues and forgetfulness
i decided to make you a home out of dead things, out of blooming
i want a pool reflecting the sky, i want to witness each walking America tremble into a bouquet
i want to hurl it at the altar of your God and tell you
He is never coming back
i want to tell you He did not leave you in this life, you left Him and no one you love is ever coming back
America, you are starving for my blood on the pavement
You want to see my porcelain bruised
i want to see your eyes swell of softer hues just this once
But they grow into ravaged beasts you scare me instead, of course
with how much you don’t care to know, i should have known you want my eyelids, petals on the ground
daffodils, everywhere
Yellow
settles
on the
earth
you might have
mistaken it for
sunlight
Her mother sings to her a
Vietnamese lullaby &
You tuck her in
the earth
every night,
Whisper open like the spring &
Watch her bloom in
the morning
You don’t respect my cause America
You never get what this is all really about
America
You soak your feet in my dawn
You laugh at the tickle of a fire after i torch your country
You take my lovers instead of me & the bodies still burning turn
Over in
their graves
remember
i wanted to laugh
but you never notice
i am crying
for you, America
as i sing you to sleep
daffodils, everywhere —